Hey, I can finally get to this web site again...I guess Tob lifted my BAN!
I finally get to respond with some rules of my own(all tongue-in-cheek/ass whatever):
1) When you hosting:
"Bubinga is on your team" -> Friendly Fire OFF
"Bubinga is on other team" -> Friendly Fire ON (But, don't tell them)
2) When your hosting and you have a 10 megabit modem/router/whatever Nom calls it, and you return to the lobby after going 24-to-3 kills-to-deaths you MUST "belly laugh" loudly and exclaim "THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN....IT WAS AWESOME!"
2a) If above match in part 2) was on LVU, immediately do next match on Casino with other team in basement to continue the fun and repeat "Belly laugh".
2b) When other team claims you are invincable, point out case where you were killed by them that "one time" even though they may have been aiming as someone else and you caught a stray bullet in the head and died accidently.
3) Repeat steps 2) through 2b) but this time get all of your kills with MK23 and C4
4) Learn the phrase "What the....oh F**K you D1gdug...get a real connection" and use it often
5) When hosting on Library vs MDFury, enable GPS and use it to find MDFury. Run to spawn corner and hug the wall because you "know" he's out there on the left side. Trigger GPS...look for red radar blip....realize radar blip is now behind you and not in front of you...say @#$%@ uh oh....hear explosion....respawn and select sniper weapon :)
6) After round when Turkey says "Well, that's it for me gentlemen...goodnight"....say "Goodnight Turkey" by the time he has said "that's..." or it's too late
7) When playing against host with "poor" connection make sure you say "I wish I had a 10 megabit router/modem/house/hub/whatever" over and over and over....because it keeps getting funnier each time you say it....yeah, that's it.
8) When you have another player muted, make sure you curse them out in the lobby like they can actually hear you. It's a good way to vent and then make people think you are talking to them instead and they'll say "Dude, what did I do?...oh yeah, you mean him...ok...yeah, that makes sense."
9) Do your best to understand what Wicked is talking about on Streets when he says something like the following: "He's shooting from the top left bottom window" Chances are there is someone shooting from both locations and the thoughts collided in his brain and came out wrong.
10) If you sneak up behind someone you MUST switch to your pistol and execute them unless the following occurs: If you suspect that the person is either Tobanator or D1gdug, quietly turn around and run away as fast as you can and you might live....maybe. If you attempt to execute them....YOU WILL DIE!
11) If Stevor is in the lobby...don't make a sound...no talking...he could laugh for 30 minutes after watching someone cut his thumb off with spoon...."He used a spoon!....ahhaahahahahahahahaha"